Are You Overwhelmed?
Apr 21, 2020
ARE YOU OVERWHELMED?
Feeling overwhelmed can lead to a number of emotions like stressed, anxiety, irritability and the list really goes on. Today, I want to share with you how I handle moments of overwhelm and what I do to lessen the negative feelings associated with it.
I’ve learned that feeling OVERWHELMED is really just focusing on too many thoughts at one time.
If you look up the definition for overwhelm, it reads: bury or drown beneath a huge mass OR defeat completely OR give too much of a thing to [someone]: inundated.
Those definitions just feel heavy when you think about it. But how many times have you thought to yourself - I’m so overwhelmed with everything I have to do OR I feel so overwhelmed with all that is going on.
It’s easy to feel like you’re drowning - buried beneath all that you have to do. It’s EASY to feel defeated by it all and it’s easy to feel inundated with all the negative feelings around feeling this way.
For me, I notice that feeling overwhelmed comes in a couple of forms. I either get really snippy with my husband and kids. Like I could go from patient and as happy as can be to wanting to kill in a matter of second. I know I can’t be the only one.
It comes to that feeling of drowning. Like I can’t breathe with one more demand thrown my way.
OR I start to doubt myself.
Is what I am doing even worth my time and effort? Will this have the impact that I hope it does? Do people even need to hear the message I feel so passionately about? My inner villain shines like she is the star of my life.
This one is sometimes harder to identify or dig out from. Self doubt is normally but can feel very paralyzing especially if it’s not easily identified. When we don’t feel enough, we are less likely to keep pushing for what we want.
When I am snippy with my family, I find myself stuck in the guilt trap. I’m sure you can relate. It’s those moments I wish I practiced more patience instead of yelling. OR question why I can feel so irritated so quickly and am left with nothing.
Many times it’s because I feel overwhelmed by SOMETHING.
The kids are making a mess of some sort. In the moment I’m overwhelmed with the thought of having to CLEAN the mess. I’ll give you a couple examples.
We have a lot of little trinket toys. Half the time the kids don’t even play with them and I find myself threatening to throw them all away. What seems to happen is these toys are dumped and thrown around vs played with.
At the moment, I’m annoyed that a mess is being made for no reason. They aren’t even playing with the toys. Which triggers me to throw empty threats like throwing out all their toys because they aren’t even playing with them. I think it’s important to note that these threats don’t work yet in the heat of the moment, I’m quick to sling them.
Another mess that grates on my nerves is them playing in this stream of water on the side of our property line. It’s a mix of water, mud, leaves and sticks. Let’s just call it a mud bath. It’s almost inevitable that the kids head to this, they get soaked and clothes end up covered in mud.
Many times I try to divert them from this spot because I’m trying to avoid a mess. My husband believes in letting them explore and be curious.
Are either of these situations the end of the world? NO, but they trigger a response that I have a very hard time letting go of. The overwhelming feeling is that I have to clean them up, wash their clothes, and so on.
But when I stop and think about it - it’s really not that big of a deal and I’m working on letting go of feeling worked up about it.
I’ll give you one last example of when I start to let self doubt creep in due to overwhelm. I committed to this podcast with the expectation of releasing one episode a week. And while that may not seem like a hard task or big deal - it entails quite a bit of work. Mainly on finding guests to interview or topics to talk about like today.
I put a lot of pressure on myself to find things that help others and are relatable. It’s important to me that anyone tuning in can walk away with something to implement that day to help them live a better life.
That can feel overwhelming to me when I’m running out of ideas or guests. And when I start to feel overwhelmed, I begin to doubt why I even started a podcast. There are so many people doing it, why is mine going to be successful or any different. Maybe I should put my focus somewhere else. And the self doubt or inner villain just takes over and becomes the star of the show.
So I want to share how I handle these moments of feeling overwhelmed.
First - I want to reiterate that it’s a focus of too many thoughts that lead me to feel overwhelmed.
Second - it’s me living in the foreshadowed future. I’m thinking about all the what if’s.
So in my best moments when I’m able to identify what is happening, this is what I do…
#1. I must identify what is happening when I start to feel snippy or doubtful - ie I’m overwhelmed by something.
#2. I ask myself - is it the end of the world if XYZ happens? Meaning, is it a really big deal if the kids get muddy or one week I put out an episode that people don’t relate to? NO, of course it’s not.
#3. I get it out of my head. I release the overwhelm by either writing / journaling or creating myself a to-do list that seems manageable.
The last one if mainly for days I feel like I have so many things to do. Many times it’s a matter of seeing what’s on the list and what are the must do’s vs the can do’s. What must get done today vs what can wait for another day.
So, my dear friend, if you’re listening and feeling overwhelmed with life I want to encourage you to think about those moments when you feel down and out. What is going on at that time? What is triggering you to feel that way? When you’re able to identify those moments, then you can start to build from blurry to 2020 vision. You can see when it’s happening and know how to dig yourself out.
I want to remind you that you are enough and don’t be so hard on yourself.
Sometimes a little grace goes a far distance.
And if you’re up for a quick 5 day challenge to go from blurry to 2020 vision, be sure to join my free group where we are going to reset 2020 - we are going to paint the possibility of a brighter tomorrow by determining what matters most and all the ways we can still make this year a good year.
Request to join the group HERE and don't forget to visit me on social media.
From my heart to yours, be safe. ♥︎